Anxious, Stressed, Sad - Building an emotional vocabulary matters!

Checking in with your students is an important step in building the competency of self awareness.  It acknowledges that they bring their whole selves into their learning experience; not just their minds, but their hearts, too.  Giving “permission” for students to share their feelings allows students to be seen and can create an atmosphere of caring and belonging. 

Given all that our students are navigating, it seems more and more important to give them- and our teachers, colleagues, and leaders- space and time to share how they are feeling.  And many of you are doing just that.  This has led some of my colleagues to reach out and express concern about the prevalence of the words “anxious,” “stressed,” and “sad” expressed when checking in with their students. 

Validating your students’ emotions is critical in helping them understand how their emotions may be affecting their behavior.  Often validation of these emotions mitigates the effect they have on behavior. Of equal importance is helping our students build an emotional vocabulary.  For sure, there has been an increase in depression and anxiety in the last few years among children, teens, and adults.  Thankfully, there is less stigma around depression and anxiety and people are feeling more comfortable reaching out and getting the help they need.  

The prevalence of these emotions is real.  AND, we also need to help our students build an emotional vocabulary so that they understand there is a difference between feeling sad and lonely; anxious and conflicted; frustrated and angry.  In Atlas of the Heart, Brene Brown states, “When we don’t have the language to talk about what we’re experiencing, our ability to make sense of what’s happening and share it with others is severely limited.” Defining emotions so that our students can accurately identify them will help them make meaning of those emotions and manage them productively. 

Teaching emotional literacy and vocabulary is not about memorizing words on a mood meter or chart.  It’s about being able to identify, articulate, and honor different emotions so that they can share and manage them.  These skills also allow us to communicate more effectively and connect with others.  I would also recommend using the phrase “I am feeling…..” rather than “I am……..”.  We experience emotions; they are not who we are.

Words matter.  Building an emotional vocabulary and articulating those emotions can have a profound effect on how we interpret, conceptualize, and understand ourselves and our world.  Especially today, this seems like a necessary skill that can help our students thrive both in and out of the classroom.